I remember as a kid wanting to be a kid. I never really got that chance though. At the tender age of 11 is when everything got sour. I remember my mom let her uncle move in. it was my grandmas brother Bruce. He was a cool dude but he stayed in his room a lot while living with us. my mom hated to see people go hungry or kids in our family being taken away by social services....I love my mom to death, but heart is too good.
My mom used to work so i was always left home with my 3 younger brothers and sister. My duties were to cook, clean, and basically look after them. Keep in mind i was no older than 12 years old. still a baby myself so who was going to look after me?
I remember on a weekend my mom went someplace with her boyfriend and didn't get back until late. My uncle had already had his hands all over me. he touched my most private parts and told me id better not tell or he was gonna whoop my ass....I cussed his ass out and told him to get his hands off of me. He just walked off quickly. When my mom got home i told her what he had done. She didn't do anything. She just said " i hope like hell you didn't do that" and that was the end of it. He said he didn't and she took his word over mine. I was hurt. Not because he touched me, but because she didn't do anything. I hated my mom for a long time for that.
Bruce lived with us for 4 years after that. and i remembered countless times where her would bust in the bathroom and just stand there for a good 10 seconds before he closed the door. I remember our bathroom was in the kitchen and i would catch him peeking in the door while i was taking a bath. Every time he would do something, i would tell my mama. She never did anything.
at the age of 16, when i had moved with my dad he died right there in my moms house. He had a chest in the room he was in with all of his stuff in it. my mom went to clean the room out and found all kinds of stuff. she opened it and found all of our dirty underwear that the bastard was probably smelling. she found bras, pornos, playboy magazines and all kinds of perverted shit. It didn't hit her until then.
She wanted to get mad after this pervert was already dead. She wanted to get mad when she seen that we weren't his only victims, that she too was a part of his fantasies. What about your daughters that he molested??? Why didn't you believe us?? Why didn't you act as if this was a big deal??
I am now 23 years old and he still gets me in my dreams. He is actually tryna get me and toots and in the dream i am protecting her... i am ready to kill this man cause I will not let him do her the way that he did me. and before i can pull the trigger i wake up from my nightmare.
*If My child ever comes to me and tell me anything like this someone is gonna get hurt. Hell yea i will believe my baby and as long as i can help it, I'm never gonna let anyone hurt her.
3 comments:
Baby girl, I can understand everything you are going through and there are times when I wake up screaming; Its scary to not be in control of your own body; let alone to have a grown man take advantage of you. And it hurts more when your mother doesn't believe you. I love you; this may be beneficial to your daughter; because you know what to look for and you'll always believe her; I always think better me than Choc!!
man... this sucks to hear and its a story heard all too often. the person i admired and loved the most was a "monster"... and from the outside looking in i can say that its not that your mtoher didnt believe you... its that she didnt want to face reality.
no but he did used to put his fingers in me and touch everywhere.
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